This essay was written in 2019 when Pope Francis was alive. I decided that I would post it here for whatever help it may be to those who might read it now. Our new Pope seems to be just a reincarnation of the old one or maybe even worse - I don’t really know. The problems in our Church seem to have increased dramatically.
All the Substack posts and the news articles which I have seen lately have confirmed my thoughts about the negative changes I have seen in our Church over the years. Giving my opinion about what can be done seems useless, as I have no power to change the hierarchy in our Church or affect what they are thinking or doing. I am old and do not have many years to live now. It almost seems as though the Church which I once thought would guide me throughout my life is not something I can depend on anymore. What I wrote several years ago might help you now, as it has helped me by rereading it.
“I have been so disturbed lately. I read all the news of what is happening in the Church. I don’t know what to do. What happens, I question, if the Church veers away from the path which Christ set out for us? What happens if the Church is changed by those who flaunt His laws and have become a law unto themselves? Where do I go? How will I know which path to follow?
Watching the movie “Full of Grace” the other day, I was reminded of what Mary might have said to Peter near the end of her life – it is just a movie - I know, yet the words ring true to me. In the film Peter was confused as he knew that Christ had left him to lead the Church. Peter doesn’t know which path to take; there are so many questions and problems. Mary says that the answer is simple, that Christ left Peter in charge, because of Peter’s simplicity. Jesus has already “blazed the trail.” Peter’s task is to follow. It is not Peter’s task to lead, to make a new path. He must simply follow His Lord.
My Catholic Ladies Book Club is reading a book on St. Therese entitled “The Way of Trust and Love” by Fr. Jacques Philippe. St. Therese discovered, or perhaps re-discovered the path of love. I have been thinking about this book as well this week. How do I emulate St. Therese? How do I gain her peace?
This morning as I was waking up all of this was on my mind. I said my little morning prayer to the Lord – “I offer You this day. May my thoughts, words and deeds this day bring honor and glory to Your Holy Name” – when I thought of my Aunt Rose – this was a surprise. Aunt Rose, who passed away in 2006, was a simple woman of great faith and love. Aunt Rose simply followed Christ every day of her long life. Aunt Rose loved those whom God put in her path. She was always full of joy; I never saw Rose without a smile. Rose loved the simple things like going to her senior club, playing bingo, taking her sister in law, Mary, and her niece Prudy out to shop and lunch, watching the birds which visited her birdbath or just being with those she had loved all her life. Aunt Rose didn’t worry about the right path – she knew she was already on that path. Aunt Rose was following Jesus.
I believe that God sent me thoughts of Aunt Rose this morning to light my path, to give me courage and confidence and peace. I am to do what Aunt Rose did – be at peace, and simply love, in all my little chores, those whom God has given me to love. I am not to worry about the decisions of others, of where they might try to lead the Church. Christ is leading His Church – even if it goes off the path, He will lead it back.
As her life was ending Aunt Rose told us that she wanted to live, that she would fight the kidney cancer which was attacking her. But, then she continued, if the time came when it was obvious that the fight was lost, it was okay, for she knew where she was going. Aunt Rose didn’t worry that the Church was on the wrong path, that the leaders were making mistakes, that some weren’t following Christ themselves. Aunt Rose just lived the life God had given her and loved those God had placed around her.
Thank you Aunt Rose for following Jesus, for showing me the way. That is all I am asked to do. Like Peter, I am only asked to follow, for Jesus knows the way.”